Tips on Wedding Day Tipping

photo by Mi Belle via Style Me Pretty

This is the only tip jar that’s appropriate at a wedding! This cute twist on a guest book asks guests to give their best marriage tips to the happy couple on a card and drop it into a “tip jar” for the newlyweds to read later. Seriously adorbs, right?!

photo by Brandon Kidd

And speaking of tipping, here are some good general tips on tipping: the who, when and how much:

Wedding Hair Stylist and Makeup Artist

Protocol: Expected
The Standard: 15%
When to Tip: at the conclusion of your service

 

Wedding Ceremony Officiant

Protocol: Expected (depending on Officiant)
The Standard: Donate $350 - $500 to the church. For a non-denominational Officiant, expect to tip $50 - $100.
When to Tip: at rehearsal

 

Wedding Musicians

Protocol: Optional, yet preferred
The Standard: $20
When to Tip: At the end of the reception.

 

Wedding Reception Emcee/DJ

Protocol: Expected
The Standard: $50-100 per person
When to Tip: At the end of the reception.

 

Wedding Reception Captain/ Maître d’

Protocol: Expected
The Standard: $100 for the wedding butler and $100 for the Captain
When to Tip: At the end of the reception.

 

Wedding Reception Bartenders

Protocol: Optional, based on contract
The Standard: $50 - $100 per bartender or waiter
When to Tip: Tip only if reception is at home. Otherwise, the service is included in the venue’s payment. Tip jars are not appropriate.

 

Wedding Transportation

Protocol: Expected
The Standard: $20.00 per person
When to Tip: At the end of the night or after the last ride.

 

Wedding Delivery People, Bell Staff

Protocol: Expected
The Standard:  $3.00 to $10.00 per trip, depending on item
When to Tip: At the time of service.

 

Wedding Parking Attendants

Protocol: Optional
The Standard: $2 - $3 per car
When to Tip: Each guest will normally provide a tip.

 

Wedding Photographer, Videographer and Florist

Protocol: Not Expected

You should put the appropriate amount of cash for each person (or group, if you’re having a band) into envelopes with names or titles on them. If you have hired a wedding planner, he/she will distribute your tips for you, usually at the end of the night. A few exceptions to that rule are the Officiant (the groom or sometimes the best man will handle this), beauty services, delivery/bell staff and obviously, the parking attendants.

We cannot stress enough - you should NEVER have a cash bar or allow a tip jar at the bar. Treat your guests the same way you would if you were having them in your home for dinner. You would never charge them for their beverages or expect them to tip for a drink or meal in your home, so don't do it at your wedding. Just. Don't.

The Great Social Media Debate

To Instagram or not Instagram…that is the question!
Let’s face it, we live in a 24/7 social media world. People are tweeting, posting and sharing more and more aspects of their lives online. In the wedding industry, we’re starting to see a great divide – brides who embrace this regarding their weddings and those who do not. As a bride, you must decide which side of the fence you fall on and go with it – whole-heartedly.

Super-charged Weddings

If you are super-techy or just love sharing your life via Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, this is the way to go. If you have some guests who are non-digeratis, you may consider explaining to them before the big day what a hashtag is and what all of this sharing is about, encouraging them to give it a try.

#spreadtheword

If you decide you want your wedding promoted via social media, go for it. All. The. Way. Create a custom #hashtag for your wedding (#WillandKatesRoyalWedding) and spread the word on your wedding website, with signage at your wedding, in your programs and signs around your reception space, asking guests to tweet, post and tag away!

Power Up

Include a charging station at your reception. But it doesn’t have to look industrial or jumbled. Make it pretty! Dress up your power bar with linens and floral. Include a sign with your custom hashtag to remind guests to share, share, share!

Unplugged Weddings

If you’re serious about having an unplugged wedding, stand firm in your convictions. It is your wedding, after all, and hopefully your guests will respect your wishes. Again, spread the word by including your choice on your wedding website, on signage at your ceremony site and in your programs.

Encourage In-the-Moment
You can just succinctly explain that you wish guests to be truly present at your wedding and ask them to please refrain from taking photos or video during your ceremony. Your ushers can also remind guests as they’re seating them that your desire is for your guests to really focus on being in the moment during your wedding and ask them to please turn off their phones and cameras and keep them tucked away. You can also ask your officiant to make an announcement before the ceremony begins, or even send some kiddos down the aisle with a reminder!

Phone Check

If you think your guests will go for it, you can even institute a phone or device check (like a coat check) at the entrance to your ceremony, a la Michael Jordan at his Palm Beach nuptials last year. If you decide to go to this extreme, it is important to inform your guests beforehand (via your website, word of mouth and perhaps even in your invitation suite). You also should be prepared for some unhappy guests who might be resistant to leaving their phone at the door. Enlist trusted friends to be your advocate in encouraging these rebels to honor your wishes.

Whatever you decide, weigh the pros and cons, discuss it with your fiancé and possibly your parents and consider your guests beforehand. It is your wedding, but considering your guests’ feelings will go a long way toward a fun and happy night for all.


image sources/credits: theknot.com, Mindy Weiss via Instagram, itsabrideslife.com, Southern Weddings, Etsy, weddingpartyapp.com, the Offbeat Bride, A Practical Wedding, Time Photos, Sarah on the Blog, Pinterest

Brand Your Wedding With Our New Custom Invitation Line

Stardust Celebrations is thrilled to announce a new line of custom invitation suites that you can design online to create the perfect paper expression of your wedding day.

This exciting new offering allows you to completely brand your entire wedding from start to finish, selecting from a variety of printing options, color palettes, typestyles and motifs. Our new collection gives you the ability to create a cohesive theme for your wedding celebration from save-the-dates and invitations to programs, menus and table numbers to gobos, signage, favors and more!

Click here to check it out today!

Wedding Reception Fun: Advice Coasters

Chances are that among your wedding guests, you will have a lot of couples who enjoy a happy, successful marriage. Why not tap into what they know and ask them for a little advice? We adore these cute advice coasters you can have out for guests to fill in during your cocktail hour.

Several stationery lines offer many different styles to choose from, with options ranging from elegant to cheeky! Stardust carries a collection of customizable coasters in round, square and octagon shapes! Come in and our stationery expert can walk you through ordering some for your big day. These would be a great keepsake; what a fun tradition to get them out on your anniversary to re-read each year!

Reception Game: Wedding Themed Mad Libs

We love this          (adjective)             idea of Mad Libs – Wedding Style from Martha Stewart Weddings! The                               (adjective)                wedding website offers a downloadable template to create these scrolls. Roll them up with a pencil and twine and put them at each place setting, giving your guests a                            (adjective)             little activity to complete during your              (noun)    . Be sure to have a friend pick them up at the end of the night so you can create a sweet keepsake book to enjoy for years.

Guest Book Alternative: Photo Puzzle

We simply adore this fun alternative to a traditional guest book from Double Trouble Jigsaw Puzzles! Double Trouble allows you to upload a favorite photo of you and your beau and then mounts it on ¼” thick piece of birchwood. The artist then hand cuts the sturdy wood into puzzle pieces large enough for guests to sign their names with a short and sweet message.

The puzzle guest books can be ordered in several different sizes and quantities of pieces to fit your guest count. A bonus is that they will include special custom pieces within your puzzle, such as the bride and groom’s names or initials, the wedding date, and so on! This beautiful keepsake is a unique and amusing way to have your friends and family share the love! Happy puzzling!

Setting a Wedding Budget

Cha-ching! It's no secret - weddings can be expensive. During the wedding planning process, establishing a realistic budget is one of the tools that will drive your planning as much as anything else. As a bride, you’ll come across many versions of a budget, whether in magazines or on websites. When you hire a professional wedding planner, she/he will prepare a realistic budget tailored to your vision and priorities.

If you feel you’d rather traverse the planning journey on your own, you should consider a few guidelines when creating your budget. For starters, as a general rule for an average wedding in the D/FW metroplex, you can expect to spend approximately $300 per guest. This would be the all-inclusive bottom line. For example, for a 100-guest affair, you’d be looking at approximately $30,000, for the ceremony and reception sites, food/beverage, décor, entertainment, etc.

How do you divvy your budget? You should start by assuming you’ll spend half of your overall budget on the reception. And you’ll want to be sure to figure in the tax and service charge for your reception’s food/beverage expenses, which adds about 30% to the quoted food/beverage costs.

After that, start prioritizing what elements of your wedding are most important to you. Do you desire incredible photography to capture your day? Are stunning floral and décor hugely important to you? Maybe you envision a phenomenal gourmet dinner. Whatever your priorities are, take them into account when allocating your budget dollars, giving more of them to the components that matter to you most.

And perhaps the most important part of budgeting is being realistic and then sticking to it and tracking your costs as you plan. Having a budget will help direct you in your planning process and hopefully save you a lot of money-related headaches along the way. Happy planning!

If you like to know more about hiring a certified wedding planner to assist you in your wedding planning adventure, click here or call us at 972.781.1619.

Guest Book Alternatives

Traditional guest books are a nice idea, but why not take it to the next level with a fun and more involved way to have your guests wish you well?!

Wishing tree
Wishing trees are beautiful and can serve as one of the focal points at your reception. On a table usually in the cocktail hour area, you have a tree from which note cards hang for guests to write a sweet message for the couple. The notes can be small rectangles, squares or circles, or they can be shaped like leaves, further adding to the “tree” effect. You can later store your sweet mementos in a memory box to be enjoyed for many years.

Photo booth
Photo booths are great fun! Some couples even like to provide crazy props to kick up the entertainment factor. Have a blank scrapbook, some photo-safe adhesive and pens at a nearby table for guests to attach their photo strip and write a message to you. The photo strips can also double as favors for your guests to take home when you encourage them to go another round in the booth!

Notes in a box or vase
Provide small blank cards for guests to write a well wish on and a lovely container such as a box tied to your theme or a gorgeous vase for them to put the notes into. You can later affix the cards in an album or leave them on display in their vessel in your new home.

Photo mat
While this alternative has been around for a few years, it is still a beloved option. Provide a photo mat around an engagement photo for your guests to sign with a short note. You’ll stop and read some of the messages every time you walk past this sweet keepsake in your home for years to come!

These are just a few ideas to get you thinking outside of the book. Do any of you have other suggestions?

Be Our Guest

Weddings are truly special; one of life’s most wonderful milestones, meant to be celebrated with family and friends. Often, between gown and tux fittings, cake tasting and budget-mania, even the most normally thoughtful couples who adore their loved ones can lose sight of their guests. While the wedding is technically about you, the bride and groom, you should take care to be considerate of your guests and let them know you’re so glad they made the effort to be with you on your special day.

The most seemingly obvious yet simple way to be thoughtful of your guests is to, well, think about them. Put yourself in their shoes. There are a few factors that will impact your guests the most – travel, weather, food/beverage and the first impression – and by just spending a little time thinking these through from the viewpoint of your guests will go a long way toward making sure your event is talked about for a long time afterward…in a good way!

Travel
Are a lot of your guests coming in from out of town? Have you reserved enough hotel rooms at an appropriate variety of room rates and did you communicate this information to them? Have you considered drive time between your lodging options and the ceremony and reception sites? Did you provide easy-to-follow, accurate directions to your venues? Often when couples have a large number of guests traveling to attend their wedding, they will have both the ceremony and reception at one venue, simplifying logistics for their friends and family. Taking it a step further, having the event at a hotel will eliminate the problem. And, many hotels will give you a better room rate for your guests if you’re having your event at their hotel.

If you do have a lot of out-of-towners, it’s very helpful to provide transportation for them. Buses are a great way to get a lot of people from one place to another – and make sure they get to the ceremony on time. Bussing is also a fun way to foster mingling between your guests who may not know each other or to give far-flung relatives a chance catch up.

Also along the lines of travel is parking. If your venue does not have a large free parking lot, you’ll need to plan for valet service. By all means, please build this into your budget! It is frustrating for guests to have no choice but to valet and then have to pay for it themselves. Even if your event site does offer a park-yourself option, providing valet service for your guests is a very generous touch and your guests will appreciate it. Make sure you explain the parking situation on the direction cards you include in your invitations. And as many guests will invariably lose it along the way, make sure to have copies of the directions on hand at the ceremony site and include one in your welcome items (more on that later).

Weather

While you obviously can’t put in an order for perfect weather, you should consider how weather could affect your event – and your guests. Did you know that May is the rainiest month in the D/FW area? January is the coldest month, while July is on average the hottest (though you probably would have guessed it was August right about now). If you’re set on an outdoor event, you must make a back-up plan in case of rain. Tents take time to construct and if earlier in the week it looks like it might rain, play it safe and get the tent! Other thoughtful touches if you anticipate rain could be a stand of umbrellas for your guests to get to their cars relatively dry or baskets of flip-flops so ladies can save their Jimmy Choo or Manolo Blahnik heels from mud.
 

If you insist on an outdoor event during the warm months, make sure you have fans, ice-cold drinks and other means to keep your guests cool and comfortable. If your event is during the winter months, you should rent a coat rack for the reception. It’s unkind to expect your guests to just keep their coats on the back of their chairs and it will kill the look you probably spent a lot of money on.


Food and Beverage
Let’s be honest, while your guests are looking forward to witnessing your lovely marriage ceremony, it’s the reception that they’re most excited about – the music, the dancing, the food and drinks!!! What a disappointment to stand at the bar and order a drink only to hear, “that will be $6.00, sir.” What?! Just say no to the cash bar. It is in poor taste to expect your guests to pay for their own drinks. You wouldn’t invite guests to your home for dinner and ask them to pay for their cocktails while they’re there, would you? Of course not! If you cannot afford a full open bar for the duration of your reception, there are plenty of more affordable options. You can offer only beer and wine; you can have a champagne-only bar or save by nixing the champagne and having guests toast with drinks “in hand” at the time of your formal toasts. Or you can forgo alcohol altogether and just serve iced tea, coffee or soft drinks.

There are so many options when it comes to food at receptions now – seated dinner, buffet, stations. While many factors will affect your choice of meal – style of reception, personal preference, the venue itself – you also may want to consider the palate of your guests. You and your fiancé may be avid connoisseurs of exotic foreign delicacies but most likely your guests, especially the older ones, will appreciate a more recognizable menu. That doesn’t mean your food has to be boring. Mix it up a little, and make sure the caterer will label the food on buffets and stations. Guests want to know what they’re being offered, and they’re more likely to try new things when they know what they are. Also, it’s considerate to steer clear of common allergens, such as peanuts or shellfish, especially if you know you have guests with allergies.

The First Impression

This one is short and sweet – plan for a little something for your guests to receive when they arrive at their hotel. It doesn’t have to be much, just a personal note thanking them for traveling to share your big day. You can arrange for them to receive it at the desk upon check-in or pay a small fee to have it left in each guest’s room. You can of course get more elaborate than a note – baskets, bags or cowboy hats filled with goodies and bottled water, brochures on local attractions and your agenda for the weekend. But just be sure to include that little note that you took the time to personally write to them to let them know you are glad they came.

 

The Bottom Line
Despite your best efforts, with so many demands on your time surrounding your wedding weekend, it is not easy to get quality time with all of your guests. Even though they may get only a few minutes of your time during the event, your guests will feel welcome and happy to be a part of your celebration if you will take the time during your planning to focus on them and what might serve them well. After all, while your wedding comes and goes in a blur, you will have these friends and family members in your life long after you say “I do.”

Please Be Seated

A “seated” wedding reception means that there is full seating or, put another way, a seat for every guest. We recommend that there be full seating for guests whenever possible. Even if your reception is a cocktail party or just cake and punch, providing insufficient seating puts the burden on the guest to find a place to sit or set down a plate or purse. Who hasn’t attended a wedding where you couldn’t find a seat and left early because of this?

The type of seating offered—full or partial-- is an important distinction when asking a venue about the number of guests it is able to accommodate. The question to always ask: “is that for full seating?” You’ll often find that the capacity quoted by a venue is not for full seating and you will be very disappointed if you were planning on providing a seat for every guest!


A decision to have full seating does not necessarily determine how food will be served. Meal service may be either a served, plated dinner, or buffet/stations.


Seating may be assigned or open. Sometimes it is best to have a combination of the two with reserved tables for the wedding party and immediate family, and open seating for all other guests.


If there is assigned seating for all guests, it is communicated in one of several ways:


Escort cards – these are cards that include the guest’s name and table number. There are many creative ways to provide this information and samples are found in just about every bridal magazine.  The cards are always arranged alphabetically by last name. If the escort card is also a favor consider giving on to every guest. If it’s just a little card, you can include married couples on a single card (for example, Mr. and Mrs. John Smith). Plus-ones should have their own card if you know the name. Unnamed plus-ones may be listed with the named guest bringing them (ie. Mr. John Smith and guest).

Seating Chart – this is a chart listing the guest names alphabetically and indicating the assigned table number. The seating chart can also include a layout of the room with numbered circles representing tables to assist in finding the right table. The seating chart is used instead of an escort card.

Place cards – these are cards put at the actual place setting to indicate exactly where at the assigned table the guest is to sit. It is usually sufficient to only assign a table and let the guests chose their own seat at the assigned table. But if you need to be very specific about who sits next to whom, place cards are the proper choice. The place card is used in conjunction with either the seating chart or the escort card.


Whew! Deciding where to seat guests can be a lot of work and you may decide to just offer open seating. If so, please keep these few tips in mind:


Always provide reserved seating for the wedding party and the immediate family. These folks are usually busy with photos right after the ceremony and remain busy greeting guests at the reception. By the time they are ready to sit-down, there may be no seating available! It’s a simple task to reserve several tables for family and the wedding party.


With open seating, you are letting all of your guests chose where to sit and with whom. Relatives, neighbors, school friends, etc. like to sit with each other and don’t always neatly add up to a table for eight or a table for ten. The result is that some tables may end up having chairs and place settings added and other tables may have open seats. It’s important to provide enough tables and chairs to accommodate what may be an irregular seating pattern. We always plan for at least one more table than we think we will need when there is open seating.

Finally, please be sure and watch the premiere episode of "Girl Meets Gown" on WEtv Sunday, April 25, 9 PM CST.  Check it out on http://www.wetv.com/girl-meets-gown

Please Manage Your Lovely Children

Having children in the wedding is a preference issue. There are no right or wrong answers, as well as no hard and fast rules. There are some considerations however, that the planning bride may want to consider.

1. Children under four are unpredictable. If a flower girl or ring bearer is young, he or she may not follow through with walking down the aisle, even if rehearsed perfectly the evening before. So brides-- always be prepared to implement a contingency plan.

2. For the ring bearer, regardless of the age, the rings on the pillow should be “pretend”. The real rings are usually given to the honor attendants or to the clergy. Two disasters can occur if the real rings are attached to the ring pillow. First, the knots must be secure in order to avoid becoming untied, this usually means the best man cannot get the knots untied during the ceremony. Second, the rings are not tied securely and they fall off the pillow.

3. Children like to run and play which usually leads to getting tussled or dirty. The stress parents place on children to “act nice’ and “not get dirty” is sometimes not a pretty sight. Weddings are often formal and are considered worship services so keep this in mind when selecting children. If a child usually follows instructions, he or she will probably be great. Conversely, children who usually misbehave do not suddenly become well-mannered after being invited to participate in a wedding ceremony.

4. Guests who bring infants or small children are usually considerate and leave the ceremony if crying begins. However, there are those who believe that sound of a crying child is perfectly acceptable. As a matter of fact, you the bride may share this view. If you do not want to hear children speaking loudly or crying, you may want to alert your greeters or house staff to direct parents to a nursery if necessary. If you know in advance that many of your guests have children, it may be a good idea to hire a sitter for the hour during the ceremony. While some children can sit quietly for an hour, most cannot.

5. It’s a good idea to have the parents sit in the first row of the temple or sanctuary, in order that children participating in the ceremony may sit during the wedding service, after the processional. If possible the children can always walk out during the recessional or be escorted out after the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom at the end of the ceremony.

6. Bringing children to the reception is a touchy subject. The bride needs to think of what kind of event she has in mind. Children can change the tone of the reception. This can be good or not so good, depending on personal preference. Some brides love the inclusiveness of all generations, others believe that receptions, like dance clubs, are no place for children. And a note for brides, if children are on the dance floor hopping around, adults will usually not dance. Someone will have the dreadful task of asking parents to keep the children off the dance floor.

7. Also during receptions, children are sometimes left to run wild. This can be dangerous not only for the child but also for wait staff and other vendors trying to provide services. So, if children are to be invited, consider engaging a sitter to keep them occupied. They can watch videos, play games or nap, while the parents can have a great night out with good music, great food and no need to worry about the children.

Lastly, some brides want lots of children participating in the wedding ceremony. For those weddings, consider having the children enter two-by-two holding hands. I have seen children come down the aisle being pulled in a wagon, still others have marched down in perfect unison while carrying candle lighters or ringing bells. This April, I know a mother of a bride who will be escorted by her 6 year old grandson. These and other ideas help to create an intergenerational ceremony and children almost always are adorable. Be creative, yet as mentioned earlier be FLEXIBLE because children will always be children.